Halloween 2008

It was a beautiful day today. Domina worked early as usual. i went to the doctor for an appointment. Afterwards W/we came home. She went to take Her nap. i helped the boy with his grim reaper costume. i put on my shiny French Maid costume :) teeheee!




It was a great chance to wear my costume. W/we didn't go to any parties but did hand out some candy. Domina had gone out to get U/us tacos. It was just a nice evening :)

Tomorrow, bear is going to come by and pick up Domina. T/they are going out to a park to go bicycle path bicycling. Domina said She needed a rest from things and She should have a great time with Her manly man sub.

It should be a nice weekend for all of U/us :)

btw Domina played with my clitty for awhile tonight as W/we talked about cuckold relating things. Domina said that if i want to know what happened when Her and bear is together i will have to beg.

sissy girl

Thoughts on.... Oct 29 2008

A few years ago through my online explorations i kept coming across topics such as "wife sharing", "cuckolding", "interacial sex", etc. At first they seemed so taboo and i guess they still are but for some reason especially since i've gotten married to my Mistress cuckolding seemed to be more and more titilating to me. i found myself immersing myself into reading forums, stories, gazing at captioned pictures etc and finding it all quite a hot topic. At the same time i was drawn to the same kind of online media dealing with feminization, sissification, etc. i used to think of myself as a submissive male who found it quite romantic to kneel at the feet of a Dominant Woman and serve Her. Of course i still think that but i have been drawn to be a girl. It all seems to make so much sense to be a cuckolded sissy girl.

When i started communicating my turn-ons in these things, Domina listened but told me that i was being obsessed with these things. She also said that Her definition of cuckolding was really mean and She saw Herself as more of a nurturing Mistress. When talking about sissy play She asked if i was gay and i said no. Of course i am bi and i thought sissy play might be fun. She said that if She wanted a girl She had a girl She used to have as a lover. At one point She told me how sometimes She misses having a strong man take Her and ravish Her but being a Dominant She made the bed and must lie in it meaning that She must always be the strong one.

i started having a kind a fantasy going through my head that was really obsessing me:

i had installed a wireless electronic doorbell between my office where i spent most of my time at the computer and Domina's bedroom and craftroom so She could call me into Her presence without shouting through the walls. It was a solution to many fights W/we had when She said She called me but i couldn't hear Her. The bell worked very well.

my fantasy started with me sitting at the computer and hearing the bell ring. i get up from my chair wearing a French Maid's uniform with the hat, cute white girly socks and mary janes. i quickly swish up the stairs to Domina's bedroom that morning and knock on Her door. She yells, "Come in!". i enter and find Her naked on Her side toward me with a naked masculine man behind Her fucking Her. i kneel by the side of Her bed and She tells me that Her and Her lover would like refreshments. She asked for wine. i curtsy and quickly proceed to the kitchen where i pour out wine in two glasses and then return to Her room and find Her now on top of him riding him. i kneel and place the glasses on Her night stand and start to rise to go. She then asks, "Where are you going sissy? i haven't dismissed you."

i then return to my kneeling position feeling quite small. She then looks at me sternly and asks, "How do you like seeing a real man fucking your Wife?"

i say, "i think its hot Domina"

Domina looks at me and smiles. "It feels so good. You should thank him for pleasuring Me."

i look up and say, "Thank you" to the man. He lays there while She continues.

From there all kinds of variations have gone through my head like Domina dismissing me or continuing telling me how i am not a man at all but a girl to Her telling me that the man is now my Master, etc.

One night i told Domina my fantasy. She listened carefully and then told me that it was doable but as things continued one day She told me that She just couldn't do it. She thought it was just too mean to me.

i stopped talking about sissification and cuckolding but the feelings and fantasies did continue. Finally an interesting thing happened. Domina started implimenting themes of both in O/our play. i've since found that If i have a want, a fantasy, etc and communicate it to Her. She will think about it and make it Her own. In a sense i believe this alleviates the age old problem of "topping from the bottom". This is something i've never wanted and Domina definitely hates.

Now there are so many aspects of my fantasies integrated into O/our lives. i think its all fascinating, tittilating and scary. So many times i've heard the words, "Be careful what you wish for. You might just get it". i think its all fascinating because of the way Domina does things. She makes them happen but in Her own way. Which is what i think of a successful Mistress. Its tittilating because they answer my fantasies and sometimes go beyond. Scary because i feel so out of control and find that i have to trust Domina on this journey. She is the one in control.

Some of the observations i have made are:

1. Domina is definitely head of the house. No one would question that
2. i am Her cuckolded sissy slave. Domina now calls me jamie and with female pronouns such as she, her, etc.
3. Domina has set responsibilities around the house as man things done by leopet and girl things such as cooking and housework to me.
4. Domina has added a third to Her harem in the form of a masculine and adventurous male She calls bear. She calls him Her slutboy sub but besides that he is like a boyfriend. She does not want me to call him Her boyfriend though.
5. Domina has the freedom to do as She wishes.
6. Domina has let me know that things cannot reverse. Once W/we have opened the marriage it cannot close nor can i not be a man again. "That ship has sailed".

Some things that has almost made me stop breathing when i've heard them has been when Domina has mentioned going out of town with bear for a weekend or to other countries in his adventures. The husband part of me kind of wakes up feeling angst that She might want to enjoy adventures without me. i tell Her that and She asks why can't She take the opportunity to have fun if She can. i then feel like i need to wrap the idea around my head. W/we are in a very non-traditional relationship. It is a kind of a one sided poly relationship.

All in all things are happy right now.

sissy girl

Updates Sunday Oct 26 2008

Wow the year is really flying by! Here it is almost November. Its getting so much cooler. i haven't been wearing shorts and skirts so much lately but more Feminine jeans when i've gone out and about. Wearing jeans of course reduces opportunities to show off my legs but of course i still shave them every other day. i just love keeping them smooth and feminine.

Last week Domina officially collared j i will now call bear. Domina wants to call Her pets by animal names. She hasn't found one for me yet so She will call me a fairy :) She doesn't want me to call bear Her boyfriend. Domina just doesn't like that. She prefers that i call him Her manly sub, leopet Her fucktoy, and me Her girl. Domina said that She does not see me as a man but as a girl. When talking about emasculation She asked how She could take masculinity away from me if i have never been a man. i love being Her girl!

Domina said Halloween i will be wearing my french maid costume almost all day. so cool!

i am now expected to wear a bra always. At least a sports bra with a small breast form when i cannot be full fem and my full bra and forms when i can. On weekends and times without the boy around i am expected to be all girl. Yesterday Domina dressed me in more drab wear with holey jeans, my ring belt, black sweater shirt and my new brown heel shoes. i wore lipstick, eyeliner, mascara etc and W/we all went out shopping in a open mall. It was so much fun. i kept getting looks. Sometimes i felt self conscious thinking, "These people must be seeing through". Domina said that really i looked like i could be a model and i moved like one too. Ahhh Domina was so wonderful saying that!

This week Domina ordered a new belly button ring for me. Its a blue sparkly lock. i really love it. It should arrive soon. She wanted to get a pink one but it wasn't available. i thought it would show more when i wear pink outfits anyway.

Domina has been talking about getting a real girl as a sub for Her stable. It is kind of difficult finding a bi-girl. Domina would like her to be sexual with both Her and the boys. i think it would be wonderful to have a girl like a sister to also keep me in check like to let me know when i might start acting/talking like a boy so i could correct myself. W/we'll see.

More and more Domina plays with the boys and makes the distinctions between Her real men and Her girl. Their's cocks and my clit. She plays with it sometimes but leaves it alone more and more. She knows i love watching. Something about the sexual tension is soo hot to me!

Domina has been calling me jamie more and more. i love it!

sissy girl

Sunday Oct 19 2008

Yesterday morning Domina, leopet and i got up. i took a shower and shaved my legs, pits, face, sissy cock and balls. i put on mascara and eyliner. i put on my Lady's low hip jeans, a plum blouse with a pretty flowery design and a denim over shirt. W/we went shopping. W/we went to Hobby Lobby, the Thrift Store where i got some new Lady's jeans, the grocery store and Hobby Lobby. W/we then went to Sam's Club and enjoyed samples and got a few things.

W/we got home and i scrubbed the bbq grill and replaced another burner. i took another shower and this time put on my pink polka dot top, my new black bra and my short short jean skirt plus my highest heels. i wore my face powder, mascara and eyeliner, and red lipstick. i asked what nail polish Domina wanted on me. She said the happy pink. A very vivid bright pink. skweeeee!

j arrived and i showed him the grill. he brought several steaks for U/us all. Domina put Her new collar and leash on him. he wore his usual jeans and t shirt.

At about 4pm, Domina's sister and new hubby rolled into the driveway. They got out and there were lots of hugs and kisses. Everyone was so happy!

W/we watched several episodes of Big Bang Theory on the DVR until Domina said to put the steaks on. j was a bit nervous about getting the steaks right but they came out beautifully and tender. W/we had steaks, baked potatoes and salad. For drinks there were margaritas, beer and wine. Yummy

j had been snarky during the day. Domina then took j after dinner up to the playroom for attitude adjustment. T/they played for awhile and when T/they came back down he was lots more docile.

W/we put on Ironman and was watching it while Domina was playing with j's cock. She wouldn't let him play with himself although it was hard for him to not do. She let him play with my clitty though and soon had him begging to suck me. It was sooo nice :) At one point She played with his cock until he came. She said i wouldn't be able to cum because She wanted me to remain docile, submissive and girly while Her sister was here.

While She was playing during Ironman, Her sister and hubby decided to go to the casino. So W/we were alone to play. After play Domina went to bed. j stayed downstairs to sleep and i was on my computer until around 12 midnight. Early in the morning j left and Domina and leopet fooled around.

Now W/we are having a nice breakfast leopet through together :)

sissy girl

Weekend plans Oct 17 2008

Today, Domina Her sub girlfriend i went out shopping for awhile. i was home before cleaning Her house to welcome Her sister and her new husband who is arriving this Saturday. i had planned on shaving my legs but ran out of time so i will surely do that tomorrow. Domina came home and i quickly dressed in my Female low belly jeans, a cami and an open denim shirt with fall leaf patterns on it. i came down and put on my black strappy sandals and put on my face powder and lipstick. i had put on mascara and eyeliner after the shower. Domina was well pleased with my new hair cut. It is perfect for me with a lot of texture and i had colored it yesterday with the lightest blonde beige.

W/we left and went to Joanns for some things Domina wanted and then had lunch at Boston Market. W/we then went to Hobby Lobby where i got a G cleft music charm for my new purse as well as a Tinker Bell charm for my belly button ring. Domina got a new lock with keys charm to put on my necklace/collar. It is more feminine with four jewels on it.

W/we then went to Super Walmart where W/we shopped for things for the weekend and then returned home.

i then left to go to a local store for some things and returned home. leopet's car was in the drive way. i came inside and went upstairs. Domina was showing leopet how to use the phone She used to use.

i went downstairs for awhile and got on my computer. i went back upstairs and saw Domina and leopet making out. She told me to get the lube and i did. Next some small rope. i went in the playroom and got some. Next the camera. She wanted me to take some pictures of his cock. So i did. Domina tied up his man cock and played and stroked it. i asked if She wanted me to put on my bra. She shushed me and continued playing until he came.

A little later W/we were watching tv while She put my Tinker Bell charm on my belly button ring and the new lock charm on my necklace collar. i love them! While She was putting on the Tinker Bell She told me that:

1. i must be on my best behavior while Her sister and husband was here. There will be no james here at all.
2. i will be all girl. i will wear skirts and all Female tops
3. She repeated that i will be on my best behavior or the consequences will be bad.
4. i will not be unduly prissy where i complain about ruining my nail polish, etc
   

i said yes Domina to all She said

i still need to replace a couple burners in the bbq grill.

Domina's new sub boyfriend j will be over tomorrow. he will be kept on collar and leash and maybe panties. Domina's sister has not yet met him. Domina plans on doing the official collaring for him in a week i think. She really has a crush for him.

Things are going very well. i just need to always know my place. No whining. No obsessions. No tantrums.

sissy girl

sissy girl's updates Oct 16 2008

Wow! so sorry i haven't posted for awhile. i think a lot of things has been going on i've been trying to leap back in and update.

Domina now has three collared people; leopet, j and me. It seems things are really happening. For the last couple weekends j, who is in an open marriage has been coming over for the weekends and Mistress has really developed a crush for him. j is an adventurous and masculine guy and very friendly. She really relates to him and enjoys the way he talks and the way he responds to stimulation in play.

Last weekend j brought over some marinated chicken breasts to grill and salad. W/we had a lovely dinner while watching a couple episodes of Rome. Mistress was playing with his cock like She loves to while laying on the futon in front of the wide screen tv. T/they really seem like boyfriend/Girlfriend. Since he doesn't live with U/us naturally Domina spends more of Her time with him while he is here.

After the episodes of Rome was over Mistress said that T/they were going upstairs to play but changed Her mind and said that T/they were going to play downstairs and asked how i was feeling. i said that i had a bit of a headache and felt a bit run down. She told me that i could watch since i am really good at it and join in when She wanted me to. W/we went back downstairs. j was naked. Domina tied his wrists together and had me get on the couch behind him and hold the binds. he really doesn't like too much bondage but i could tell he was getting excited.

Mistress tied up his cock and started playing with it and kissed and made out with him back and forth. She started sucking his cock and then looked up at me telling me to watch and learn. It was really hot watching Her suck another's cock. Soon She got naked and got on his cock and started riding it. She pulled me down off the couch and started playing with my sissy cock. i almost came immediately. It was so exciting!

W/we all then went upstairs. j was sleeping on the floor under some comforters. i was on my computer for awhile. Before i left j was playing with Mistress with a vibrator.

Through the week there has been an almost endless exchange of emails between T/them. She is really excited about him.

i on the other hand have had some problems. i get really frustrated over things some times like being unable to find tools, kitchen utensils, etc where they are stored because we are not on the same sheet of music about organization. i have tried communicating it to Domina but i guess i come across like i think i'm better than everybody or something. Usually its pointed out how cluttered my office is and such. These exchanges got heated and i don't feel so girly and in Mistress's mind james comes out. james is not wanted here. Mistress and i both prefer jamie, Her cuckolded sissy girl, sweet and all. Tuesday night W/we had a very serious talk. It was really scary to me. Anyway, i woke up when Domina woke up the next morning at 3:30am and when She left i was like a tornado removing the clutter from the office as well as the kitchen and did other housework. i went out later shopping and bought Mistress a couple dozen roses.

Things have really improved now, i just need be stay girly, be jamie. Mistress has Her boys.

After Mistress came home She went to take Her nap. W/we talked a bit about j and things. i asked Her if She was turned on cuckolding me. She said that as a person She is still trying to believe that it isn't hurting my feelings but knows that it turns me on. As a Mistress She said that it seems to be growing.

Mistress had been working on a collar for j and other jewelry. She told me to put Her jewelry stuff away because She was done. i asked Her about something She said She was going to make for me, a surprise. She said She was going to get back to that and hinted that it was something for my sissy cock. i have a feeling it will be a chastity device. we will see.

Today j came over for some play in the play room. Mistress sent me off to get Her a new phone, get a hair cut and some burners for the grill. i bought a new Instinct for Her, got a fairly adrogynous hair style that Domina loves and the things for the grill.

Tonight W/we watched tv while i showed Her how to use the phone. my new black bra with pockets for the forms arrived. i love it! Its just like the white one but new and black. i've about worn out the white one.

Tomorrow Her boy goes to his Uncles for the weekend. Mistress's sister got married today and her and her new husband is coming Saturday for the weekend. She and her husband wants us to be as we are without non-scening people around. me all girly and dressed, j in collar and leash, etc. It should be an exciting weekend!

whew!

sissy girl

Photoshoot

Monday a bi-male friend of Domina's came over to do the photoshoot he has been wanting to do for some time. He is really turned on my t-girls and he really liked me.

Domina came home early from work since She had a doctor's appointment early that afternoon and She went to bed. She didn't want to be disturbed and i thought about cancelling the photoshoot but She told me not to. She wanted pictures. She also told the guy that there wouldn't be anything but the photoshoot.

He came over at about 10am and i had just got out of the shower. i put on a robe and went downstairs and let him in and showed him to the living room. i went back upstairs and finished putting on my makeup and put on a pink cheerleading uniform and proceeded downstairs. we went outside to the back yard and i realized i forgot my bra with forms so i went upstairs and put it on and went back outside. He took a few shots and then i went back upstairs and changed. We were back in the living room and he took more shots. i changed again in different outfits. i put on my new fetish french maids uniform and he took more pics. i then put on my black and pink striped cami with red lacey panties and was really feeling slutty. The poses were getting more and more suggestive and while he was kneeling down said he just had to do this and took my clitty in his mouth and started sucking. It was feeling so good and i was feeling slutty and oh so girly. He looked up and said that was the first time he had done that and did some more. He asked if i would cum in his mouth and i said i couldn't do that. i went upstairs and changed again and told Domina about what had happened. She was turned on and asked if i wanted to cum and i said no. She said, "Good girl".

i went back downstairs in a lingerie outfit and there were more pics. Back and forth with different outfits and also with a long dress.

Finally i put on an outfit i wore to a bi-group meeting a few weeks ago and took shots out on the deck. He gave me his storage card and i downloaded the pics to my drive while he was kneeling by my desk sucking me some more. i never did cum. Its hard to want to because i lose a lot of my docile nature and femmed nature when i do.

He got up to go and was looking at me funny and kissed me. Then he kissed me deep. What a wild morning! Mistress was very pleased :)

sissy girl